I had something happen this weekend and it was a HUGE teaching moment for me. Frankly, it broke my whole heart! As I was thinking, “I wish I could undo that” I thought, well, maybe some of you can learn from my mistake!
I have never really noticed it before but I use the words “I look horrible” a lot. It is not even something I really think about- but if I have unwashed hair or no make up on, etc.. I am known to just throw that out there- “man, I look horrible”. If there is a bad picture of me, I am really quick to say “I look horrible in that picture”. Or if I am at the girls school with a hat on and someone says, “Jenica, you look darling in that hat” I immediately respond with “I look horrible”. I think in an effort to be humble I do not receive compliments gracefully. Why is it so bad to just say “thank you”? Anyway, we were chatting this weekend and Dave told Ellie she looked pretty..and she responded “oh dad, I look horrible”- WHAT!!! I said, “Ellie please dont say that, you are beautiful always!” and she said “well, I haven’t showered and I just look horrible”. It just about ripped my heart out on the spot. She has heard me say that 1000 times and that has taught her that if she hasn’t showered or gotten ready she “looks horrible”. Let me tell you something, I am going to change my ways IMMEDIATELY! Thank God for his grace and showing me this while they are still young- I feel like I can use it as a teachable moment for her and for me.
I have always heard people give the advice- tell little girls they are smart, talented, etc.. first before stressing that they are so pretty, beautiful, etc.. (we have all read the article HERE) I always read that and think- why can’t we tell them all of that? We live in a world where they will get ripped down in every way (even the most beautiful by the world’s standards get ripped apart by people- have you seen celebrity magazines? It is horrible)- why cant we build our kids up in every way at home? God did make them beautiful and his handiwork is GORGEOUS! I don’t mind telling them that! Of course we stress that what makes someone beautiful is Jesus shining through them- you can see it in the smile, in the sparkle in their eyes, etc.. But that they are absolutely beautiful because God knit them together perfectly AND he also gave them great talent and brains- they are fearfully and wonderfully made! So, the fact that I might have contradicted that teaching in any way with my words and actions- breaks my heart! It just further reminds me that we can “preach” all day long, but our actions and the way we live says more than a million “lessons taught”.
It is a tricky business, motherhood- instilling confidence, humility, positive self image, security…I am not perfect but Praise God..He is! I pray that if I fail at everything else- I will point them to THE ONLY ONE who will never fail them or let them down..Jesus Christ!
Thanks for learning this lesson with me! Girlfriends..if you catch me saying I look horrible- call me out!

{I love this- I found it on THIS blog- “When you called me to be a Mama, You didn’t ask for Perfection. But that with every breath, I’d point them to you.”}

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